I see my guts splashed across a screen. I want to get my fingers into this art of my mine. My face, creeping at me and not letting go. I’m my own target.
Tears are close now. Pouring outside my body. Warm washes laying me down now. And it hurts.
It’s awful. This heart with its pain. The stress of it all. I breathe into you, you restless tiger, serpent undoing, the culprit, patient, dying doctor.
Been bottled up too long now. I know this. Feel it. A great truth realized. Maybe if I can stick it in deeper I might get it out. Maybe. I might.
Breaking hearts. Yeah. That’s me. Broken. And wanting to smash those pieces. I don’t want that memory. I don’t want this hate. But there’s no escape.
This is a cold place. Real cold. Seeing my gangly arm twist up towards some forgotten sun. Hurting so much. Can’t breathe.
Forever’s lost on me now. A “once was place”… lost.